Special

Never thought I'll say this
They really are a special bunch
Her friendliness is overwhelming
Her love extends to even total strangers
A kind of love that I know I'll never be capable of giving
In her world, everything seemed so clear
No pretensions

I wished I had more to offer
'Cos I seemed to have received more than I could ever give
I had thought that I would be afraid
Didn't expected that they could be so endearing
Simply because what you see is what you get
And you know they would never hurt you
How can you not love them?

I guess I've always been attracted to smart and beautiful people

Yet it is these people, the smart and beautiful ones, who constantly hurt you

And it is this other group, not the smart and beautiful ones, who will tug at your heart

I believe God puts them here for a reason

Perhaps it is to teach people like us that, at the end of it all, what's valuable is the human factor

Wonder and amazed

"The Lord is good. His love is eternal. And His faithfulness endures forever."

Psalm 100:5

This is the memory verse for the children for the month of June. This morning, I was pleasantly surprised to see the children reciting this verse from memory. Even Ruth, who is in K1, could put the words together in the correct order. But perhaps I shouldn't be that surprised in the first place. These are smart children after all. Guess there are times when I underestimate them. Maybe that's why I like to interact with young children. I supposed I learnt from them as much as they learnt from me.

They never fail to amaze me

On a side note, sometimes physical age isn't always a true reflection of who you are inside. Perhaps there is a child in all of us.

After what happened the last time, I wondered how I could have the courage to actually try again. Perhaps deep inside, I wanted to believe that it is not only about me. I guess in everything that we do, there is the risk that it would not go as expected. That we could still be disappointed, in spite of all the efforts put in. And one lesson learnt is that certain things are simply beyond our control. Maybe that's just my problem. Too controlling.

All of them told me that the experience is more important than the results. Wonder how many of them actually believed that. But then again, I can't say I disagree either. I don't know what to make of this now. Guess the fear is still there, and I dare not take anything for granted now. Perhaps not as much is at stake now. Perhaps I should learn to take things in my stride.

Waiting

"The need to find a meaning and purpose in life"

The Gallup Poll

Sometimes, life seemed like an endless waiting game
I guess people generally do not like waiting.
We're an impatient bunch, aren't we?
So much efficiency that even waiting for 5 minutes becomes a chore

Taught the children the story of Joseph yesterday.
He is an amazing character.

Who would have expected that a father's love can cause him so much trouble?
Yet it is understandable why his brothers would be jealous of him.
Was he arrogant or merely insensitive to the feelings of his 11 brothers?

Just when he thought that everything will be going well for him,
he was sold to Egypt to become a slave.
Betrayed by his very own brothers

In Egypt, he became his master's trusted aide
Yet in the end, he was thrown into prison by that same person

One couldn't help wondering how Joseph would have felt at that time
Did doubts creep into his mind?

That his dream was perhaps just a dream after all

I like the story of Joseph because of the promise it entails
The promise that God will never forsake you, even when it seemed like He had
And as the story goes, Joseph did become a powerful man in Egypt in the end

No, waiting isn't easy
But waiting in hope is something else...

Confused

I am confused.
Not even sure if I should feel happy or disturbed

Why are intentions so difficult to interprete?
It feels like deja vu, only different

Don't know what it's meant by that

Perhaps there's nothing to it after all
Perhaps my expectations will get blown up again
Perhaps I just shouldn't think too much

But...

What do you mean when you told me all that?
Is it because you just need a listening ear?
And I happened to be there?

After all, I hardly knew you....

Happy

It's great to just sit and chat without a care in the world
Telling each other about our dreams and aspirations

Thank you...

...for lending me a ear when I needed one

Thank you...

...for being so patient and for enduring all my rantings

Thank you...

...for just being you

Yes, I should feel happy and there is no reason why I should not be

Not for keeps

I guess one lesson learnt from all these is not to take anything for granted. Perhaps the saying, "Anything that can go wrong will go wrong", is true after all. I really have to learn to mind my own business. This does not concern me anyway.

Social holiness. "Love thy neighbour as thyself"
Oh Lord, why is that so difficult to do?
The last thing I want to do is to step on others' toes
I'm sorry if you take it any other way.
It's nothing personal. Really.

In the end, what is most important?
What the world sees vs. what God sees
Obligation vs. obedience
Faith vs. works

Have I forgotten what my purpose in life is?
Why am I faltering here?
God, what should I do now?

I feel like sleeping
Maybe when I wake up,
Everything will be alright
Or maybe not
Guess some things are just not for keeps

Baffled

Some people never cease to baffle me.
Maybe I just shouldn't read too much into it

Moods

Haiz...mood's been fluctuating nowadays.

Almost lost my temper just now

Felt bad that I took it out on him when I knew that it's not entirely his fault.
Why did it turn out this way?
This was supposed to be fun.

A part of me just wished to quit now.
After all, maybe they don't need me anyway.
But I've already made a committment and quitting now would make me seemed irresponsible.

I'm just tired.
I don't want to care anymore.
Got the feeling that whatever I say would not make a difference anyway.

Insignificance. Perhaps that's what it is.
It doesn't matter. Really. Just do what you like.

We are the Reason

I simply love this song...


Avalon - We Are The Reason Lyrics

As little children
We would dream of Christmas morn
Of all the gifts and toys
We knew we'd find
But we never realized
A baby born one blessed night
Gave us the greatest gift of our lives

We were the reason
That He gave His life
We were the reason
That He suffered and died
To a world that was lost
He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

As the years went by
We learned more about gifts
The giving of ourselves
And what that means
On a dark and cloudy day
A man hung crying in the rain
All because of love, all because of love

I've finally found the reason for living
It's in giving every part of my heart to Him
In all that I do every word that I say
I'll be giving my all just for Him, for Him

We are the reason
That He gave His life
We are the reason
That He suffered and died
To a world that was lost
He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

He is my reason to live

Grateful....

Thank you Lord...Thank you...

Just when you thought that everything is going so wrong
It's shown once again that all is not lost
'Cos He's still in control and He still loves me
For that, I'll be eternally grateful...