Complaining

During cg last week, the discussion somehow drifted to the topic on complaining. Our cg mentor brought up this verse,

Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe

Philippians 2: 14-15

How apt, especially since I've blogged in my previous post on how much I have been complaining 2 weeks ago and the negativity it had brought about.

Then another verse was brought up:

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Philippians 4:8

I guess we all have a choice. What would you choose to think of?

I have so many things going through my mind now that I do not know where to start. Perhaps a short break is beneficial after all. At least it allows me to think and reflect back on what had happened during the past few weeks. Existing problems and shortcomings were further amplified by the current situation. As I had blogged before, people were behaving out of character, contributing to the already tense atmosphere.

But I'm done with whining and complaining.

I am reminded once again of the story about the Potter and the Clay. After all, how many times in our lives are we able to experience this? Instead of embracing the challenges and striving ahead, we threw our hands up in the air and lament about the past and the 'good old days'. At times I feel sorry for this new system. Though it is true that there are still problems to overcome, I feel that it was not given a fair trial. We were so inclined to compare it to the past system, so much so that we forgot that the 2 systems were completely different. We went in with unrealistic expectations of what this system can bring, and when problems cropped up, it became a self-fulfilling prophecy.

And in a way, this attitude is reflected on how people were treated as well. This comparison between the old and the new, and failing to see that both are completely different. I know comparison is inevitable and more often than not, it boils down more to the person who is doing the comparison than those who are being compared. The new might never be as good as the old in terms of experience and knowledge. The sad thing is, very few people realise this. Perhaps they'll never understand until they are in that situation themselves, and even then, they still might not.

But I don't seek their understanding. Not anymore. People can compare all they want but they have to realise eventually that we are different. I admit that I was hurt by all these comparisons before but I've come to realise that this is one shortcoming that God wants me to overcome. A stronghold that I have been struggling with since the first day I came. I have to stop letting pride get in the way. After all, I am not here to knock anyone off the pedestral. There isn't a need to.

Just as it is with the new system. The old is never coming back again. We can either adjust our mindset and accept this new system for what it is, with its advantages and disadvantages; or we can continue looking back at what is past and in the process, forgetting that we are living in the present.

Where there is a need...He will provide...

It's Saturday again. Somehow, a part of me wishes that the weekend never ends. But I guess everything has to come to an end eventually. I thought the week before was hectic, and that things will be alright once the system is up and running. I thought wrong. This week has been anything but that. Almost everyone seemed tense and impatient and all of a sudden, people started getting on each other's nerves. It was beginning to get difficult to keep our cool when the pressure was on us.

At times, I wonder why it is that God has to put us through all these. Yet I believed He has a reason for everything. Just as what one of my colleagues said a few days ago, through this system change, we could see the other side of our fellow colleagues.

Through it all, I still thanked God for small mercies. After all, there is nothing too big or difficult for Him to handle. And where there is a need, he will provide.

New beginnings?

Have been staying back late at work for the past one week, to the extent of working til 12mn last Thursday. What a great start to the new year.

It has only been one week and I'm already starting to feel burnt out. Also realised some things that I would rather not know. Why do people always say things that they do not mean? Or am I being rather naive here for always taking things at face value? I am tired of second guessing the intentions of others. I just don't want to care anymore. Perhaps Renee was right after all, I always turn the other cheek, and ended up getting hurt over and over again. Am I too quick to forgive and forget? Should I just learn to protect myself so that I won't get hurt so easily?

One of my colleagues said last week that if going to heaven means praising God all the time, he would rather not go to heaven. That makes me kinda sad because this was coming from a person who has (or had) been a christian all his life. To me, heaven isn't only about paradise, it is also about being with God. And there is nothing else I would want more. Because I know that only He could love me for who I am inside. And His love never fails...